the silence in black and white.

The less you move on the ground

the more the world moves around.

— Ana Claudia Antunes, The Tao of Physical and Spiritual.

————————

i've wasted so much time.

now i'm wasting more

wishing i could turn back time,

so that i'll stop paying for the mistakes

with time i can never collect back.

how do you describe this feeling?

it hurts so much,

so it must be pain.

where am i now?

in a place that is

filled with so much pain

as though i'm

ascending the word cline of pain.

it's not the time yet,

it's not the time to settle.

how do i move forward,

move sideways, move on —

how is it time to settle —

if my mind is not settled down.

is my mind ready to settle down

just like my heart is telling me to?

we leave the pain from the memories behind,

but we don't leave the memories of the pain.

we somehow tighten our grip on it,

promising ourselves that they serve as

reminders of where we were and

where we are going to be.

but where are we going?

————

lost at sea.

lost sight of the shore.

lost memory of the land.

lost myself to this life.

————————

M.

falling foward as she walks towards the light.

let's go down now
into the darkness
of your thoughts
hurry up now
we're waiting for
us to fall
i fall to pieces now
a broken mirror
in your life.