now i'm holding on.

"Dream delivers us to dream, and there is no end to illusion. Life is like a train of moods like a string of beads, and, as we pass through them, they prove to be many-colored lenses which paint the world in their own hue."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson.

----------------

Palpitating;
the heart won't stop beating
in rhythm with the train
as it races across the track.

Streaming;
the sweat won't stop dripping
in rhythm with the heart
as it beats too fast to be caught.


--------

The train kept going,
moving off at lightning speed.
The train won't stop,
there were no stops.

The mistake was
to get on the train

in the first place.
Or was it not - a mistake?

The first step onto the train
was like a fish taking a bait.
The wonders the train could offer

- too irresistible, definitely not a mistake.

The train kept going,
the time went with the train.
The train won't stop,
time won't stop either.

The first step out of the train
was almost impossible.
The wonders the train could offer 

- resistible, definitely a mistake.

Were there other ways to get off the train,
or other ways to travel rather than the train?

The outside could have a sun shining so bright
and a breeze to cool off
with a scenery to view,
what more could you ask for?

Except I asked for a shortcut,
I took the first step.
I went up the train,
and now I can't get down.

I wanted an escape,
and I got mine on the train.

Except I can't get off it now,
I took the first step.
I went up the train,
and now the train is going nowhere.

Train wreck, that's what I am.

--------


Is there a possibility of a self-induced high
- one which can be achieved with or without a placebo?

Is there a possibility that one could simply be high on life
- consumed by the face that life is enriching and purposeful?

With that high,
would there be a low?

While we face all sorts of crashes
such as disappointment, disgrace,
or simply wearing off of the caffeine,
a crash could simply be referred to
as a well deserved rest.

There's sun after the rain,
and sometimes,
even a rainbow.

But what about the storm
after the sun has shined all day.

Is there a length or extent of a high?
Could it be individualized?


Or is it all self created within the mind?

----------------

M.

myself was never enough for me.

gotta be so strong.